I never go to Joondalup. It’s like they say, there’s no “there” there. Sorry guys, but I have a mate, Barney, who lives there with his missus and kids in a pretty nice house – four fridges, plumbed in barbecue – I have been up there and looked around. Lake Joondalup is pretty. But why would I go there, really?
I think it would be the perfect place to hide the Bell Tower and the Perth Convention Centre. So maybe that’s a use for it. I was discussing this with the GF, whose mate Joanne lives up there, too. Neither of them liked my ideas.
But I’ve got a lot of ideas for replanning Perth. Sink Riverside Drive so the city can go out to the river. Sink St Georges Terrace so we can stick in more kebab vendors and change the street drinking laws. Sink Hay Street and turn it into an roller rink. Use the space where the Convention Centre used to be for a WA Music Museum with permanent exhibitions to V Capri and Slim Jim and the Fatts Band.
Buy up all of Burswood – blow up that hole the Cas’ – and build a gigantic Sporting Arena. If you see any of these ideas come up in the next 18 months, you’ll know who they ripped them off of.